I just came back from a three-day stint at the hospital. I'm only home because I've been taught how to self-administer a few different types of injections. I still have my shunt so it's not that difficult.
I'll be fine in time.
But it took me another "health crash" to realize that I'm always pushing myself too hard. I push myself to the point of exhaustion. I can never say no to others. I always think that I can't stop or the world is going to end. Something like that.
Before it all went down the shitter I could feel something coming. Out of instinct, I decided to cancel a trip I had planned for November. It nothing related to work but it was going to be a financial burden for sure and I did not need any more burdens. Then, on my way over from the hospital, I had to cancel Otakuthon too because I'll be bedridden for a little while longer, and if I CAN walk around by then, I definitely can't do anything as strenuous as a full day's worth of shooting. I dreaded saying I could not do the job, but at the same time, part of me welcomed the break.
Cancelling these two major events made me realize that I needed to slack off, for my own sake. And so I'm going to start doing that.
I've decided to continue with my current projects which I have definite engagements on. After that, I will revise my participation with various events I'm covering. I'm expecting to do less of them in the near future. I don't want to stop - All I know is that I will be doing things very differently.
More will be said when I know how exactly.